Vivid Dreams
The night before, I dreamt I was taking a five hour exam. Something really important. There was a break, and I went outside. As I was returning, there was terrible wind. I literally had to crawl on the sidewalk, which was covered in plastic that I gripped. Along the way my dad was beside me, trying to help but somehow ineffective. I was struggling and mad at my dad for being useless and a hindrance.
Somehow I get back to the exam room and everybody’s just chatting. Then I wake up with an urge to pee.
The anguish, the struggle stayed with me as I brushed my teeth. I didn’t even want to go back to sleep.
The anguish was so real. I had no idea I was dreaming, despite the obvious (in hindsight) nonsensicalness. Like in the matrix, or Inception, if we’re dreaming and can’t wake up, how do we know if we’re dreaming? What if life was just one long dream, ending when we die?
Even the past and future are illusory. History is in memories, in books. Everything is interpreted by our minds right now. We fantasize about the future but it is only in the now that we can verify our fantasies, and even then, we verify with our memories.
Do you ever have weird dreams?
I’m grateful for:
- Not having exams anymore. Yoga Thailand was enough.
- Finally getting trataka working.
- No teaching tomorrow. I’m tired. My leg needs rest.
- The Chinese medicine wrapped around my leg. It smells, but it seems to help.
- Having a fun conversation with my cousin Emily (Big Bo). I don’t think she connects with many people in the family.