Day 65/360: “Let’s See How Far I Can Take This”

I wake up at 11 a.m. It’s been a while since I had wheatgrass juice, I’m going to make some. Nomad said to only take a shot of wheatgrass at a time but he’s a wuss — it doesn’t taste that bad. I juice all the wheatgrass and have a martini glass of it:

I feel nauseous. My body’s too toxic to contain all this goodness. I try to man up and absorb the goodness instead of succumbing to my puking but fail. Two lessons learned: 1. wheatgrass juice is consumed in small amounts not because of the taste; 2. with no prior warning, I can run to the bathroom in 0.93 seconds.

After recovering from the wheatgrass I go for ramen, my favorite toxin, with Turbo and Drew. Damn, no hot girls at the ramen place.

I go for a cup of water. A girl is pouring herself water in front of me. I ask, “Is that cold water or hot water?” She says it’s cold water. “Is it filtered or unfiltered?” She laughs, says she doesn’t know, and walks to the guy behind me. Later, Drew tells me the guy behind was giving me the death stare. I have that effect on boyfriends.

I go home and food coma knocks me out. So much for day game.

I wake up and shower. Ever since I had my one night stand over a year ago, I’ve been trying to replicate that experience. What did I do right that night that I haven’t done since? One of those things was attitude: every time the girl complied, I thought, “Let’s see how far I can take this.” Tonight I put those words into my cheatsheet.

I have two thoughts as I enter the rocker club: I’m here to test my presence, and “let’s see how far I can take things” with each girl.

I go in and see DUI girl with her roommate. They greet me, we hug. They’re in the loud band area so I can’t hear anything. DUI girl likes my hair, her roommate likes my jacket. I decide to hit on other chicks to use them as social proof and vice versa. Plus I have a prior agreement to not hit on the roommate.

I see a girl by herself, leaning against the corner of a wall. Horse girl. She completely ignores me entirely. I repeat, “So are you her?” Ignore. I leave.

I see two black girls standing by themselves. I open the short girl: horse girl, psychic, reckon/yonder. A guy comes in. I use Martyr’s tactic and compliment him on his shirt, asking how much he got it for. We chat a little. He’s the tall girl’s boyfriend. I continue talking to the short girl. We’re having good conversation so I tell her, “Give me your number before you say something stupid,” my variation on “Give me your number before I don’t want it anymore.” She laughed and gave me her number. I verify her number on the spot. She says, “It’s nice meeting you,” but I’m not leaving. I realize I haven’t run my stack. Smart tests, smart/hot/rich. I share stories and use the “do I look gay” opener. I am touching her playfully the whole time. The couple leaves, which I interpret as: they’re leaving us alone. I kiss the tall girl goodbye and put my arm around the short girl. “Since we’re getting to know each other, let’s play the question game. No boring questions, no repeats. I’ll start. How did your last relationship end?” She answers but afterward she leaves to meet her two friends. She looks back and tells me to call her.

I look for more girls and run into short girl again. “Are you stalking me?” She smiles and heads to the bathroom.

I see a two girls and two guys together. Sex last week. No it’s not her. “Are you Megan?” She is! I keep insisting we had sex, she keeps denying it. The game gets boring. She pulls one of the guys and says, “I was fucking him last week.” I’m done, but I pushed it a little to see how it would turn out. I tell the guy, “I’m sorry I had sex with your girl last week.” He said that’s impossible, he was having sex with her. I ask, “Was this before or after 10 p.m.?” He replies, “We were having sex all night.” I’m bored so I leave. In retrospect I shouldn’t have milked the opener. I should have transitioned sooner. I was proud of opening a mixed group; upon entering one of the guys gave me the death stare, haha.

A blonde at the bar is by herself. Sex last week. She laughs and says it’s not her. I ask if she’s Megan, she says it’s not. DUI girl comes in — they’re friends! They have a few shots together but DUI girl backturns me the whole time. Odd.

I see a cute Indian girl with a chubby emo girl. They split up to go to the bar. I horse girl the Indian girl. Halfway through the opener she ignores me to talk to the emo girl. I grab her attention again and continue the opener. She laughs. I’m surprised I was able to reengage her after she ignored me like that — normally I eject. She says it’s not her and leaves with the emo girl.

A girl enters the club. I open her with sex last week. It wasn’t her. We exchange names as she walks away. I should have quickly stacked but the window was small before she walked away.

A guy opens me. I socialize with him. He introduces me to his other friend. I socialize with them both. The other friend introduces me to a girl. I game her. Smart tests. I get the logistics. She’s the other friend’s girl. Oh well. I still touch her all over and vibe with the whole group. The club is closing so they leave.

I open a girl behind me with sex last week. Smart tests, smart/hot/rich, 8 girlfriends. She’s got a girlfriend who loves cock too much so they have an open relationship. She is faithful to her girlfriend though so she won’t be my girlfriend #9. I respect that. She leaves.

I see a tall blonde by herself. Sex last week. No it wasn’t her, she has a boyfriend. “You didn’t tell me that last week!” “That’s because we’ve never met!” Okay that contingency doesn’t work. Next time I’ll play along more, “Yeah I know, we have to keep this relationship discreet.” She leaves.

I leave the club and go to the parking lot.

I see DUI girl’s roommate. I give her Jake’s flirty finger greeting. She comes over. We talk about afterparties. She’s rubbing my jacket the whole time and says she loves it. The roommate of the guy she’s fucking (whom I have an agreement with) joins us. Damn, I was hoping to get her number. We chat a little but I eject. “See you next week!”

I see two girls standing by themselves. Horse girl to the taller one. It’s not her. Am I gay? Maybe. She says gay guys always come up to her with weird shit. We talk nonsense for a few minutes. I share identity stories, use the “do I look gay” opener. Their ride comes. I get the shorter girl’s e-mail because she doesn’t give her number. I don’t push it because their ride is right there.

Having a mindset of “I need to open to test out my outfit” made it easier to open. I wasn’t doing it to fuck the girls, I wanted to see what reaction girls would give me. (They were largely positive.)

Having a mindset of “Let’s see how far I can take this” gave me a map of what I needed to do throughout the interaction. In the past I unconsciously had the mindset of “Open, attract, attract, attract…” This made me cautious because I didn’t want to lose the attraction so I would not take risks or move the interaction forward. The girls get bored or I prematurely eject to lie to myself that I left on a high note. Tonight my mindset made me push the interaction forward because I wanted the blowout. I continued talking when the girl gave me her number and told me it was nice meeting me. No, I stayed because I wasn’t done with her, and kept escalating. I tried to overcome obstacles to see how I would do and things worked out better.