Day 40/360: St. Patty’s Day

Mr. S had a date tonight and wanted me to wing him because his date had a friend. So we went to the local tourist bar to warm up.

102. C<5: Saw a girl standing by herself. Decided to warm up. Sex last week, cat, smart tests. For some reason I didn't finish smart tests, I only asked her, "Are you smart?" She said yes, then followed up with, "The real question you should be asking is, am I interested? And the answer is no." I said, "What a coincidence!" and stood there for a few minutes, ignoring her, until I decided to approach other girls. Or so I thought.

The bar was getting really crowded. Mr. S and I were both uncomfortable with the crowd, so we went elsewhere. While driving, Mr. S decided that the girl was flaking so he dropped me off back at the same bar and drove home.

For what felt like three hours (but in actuality one hour) I walked around, full of anxiety. The crowdedness and going solo was getting to me.

I walked back home, wondering what I could have done to fix tonight, aside from the obvious, which was to approach. I determined that I had extra anxiety tonight because I wasn’t warmed up and since I no longer allow myself to eject, each approach has become more difficult. The crowds and going solo also made things more difficult for me.

I discussed this with Dylan when I got back. To fix this, I must remember to do my three warm up approaches. To make things extra smooth, my warm ups do not need to last, my intention is to approach and eject immediately. (Of course, if the approach hooks, I will probably wind up staying anyway.)

103. C>5: Drew texted me that he saw Mr. S on his date. It turned out his date just got out of the concert really late and met up with him. I drove to the diner they were at, pretended I was getting some food and just happened to run into them. I started chatting with the friend, but they were on their way out. I think I did a good job winging. Just normal conversation, played with the various green stuff she had on, reckon/yonder, eat shit. Ran confusion game on her: when she asked me what music I listened to, I made her guess, then told her I listened to Barney music, the alphabet song, itsy bitsy spider.

The girls and Mr. S left, I pretended to use the bathroom, then left. I ran into a bunch of the coaches and we went back to the same diner. Ate some food, chatted.

104. C>5: I went to the bathroom. A tall black chick came out of the men’s bathroom. I accused her of being one of those chicks with dicks. She assured me she has a pussy. She said she would like to be one, I put my arm around her and said, “Didn’t your mom ever tell you you can be anything you want to be?” It turns out she said, “I would like to meet one.” I told her about where I lived, how there are lots of gay and lesbian people there. Demanded her name, cat. Tour guide, but she lives in the valley. I teased her about being a valley girl, said she should be a blonde white cheerleader. I said I was black. Some guy ran into the bathroom, I blamed her and spanked her. She said if she were alone she’d give me her number. At this point I should have said, “You can keep your number, you’re in my friend zone anyway.” The guy left, I said my goodbye, went for a kiss but got the cheek. I went to the bathroom alone.

It was an interesting night. Although I didn’t approach as many girls as I normally do, I made myself go out alone regardless, and stayed in despite not feeling well. I made an emergency effort to wing Mr. S; hopefully that helped his overall game. The girl at the bathroom was attracted but I didn’t escalate enough. Still, a pretty good effort at approaching, practicing teasing.

C<5: 1
C>5: 2