Day 22/360: I Feel Bad

We arrived at the college frat bar late. The place was packed, everything was either in big groups or mixed sets, the ratio was pretty bad. I didn’t open anything for a while.

Finally decided to do so. I saw two girls and a guy in a tight huddle. I peeled off one girl, horse girl. She truly believed my story and wound up praising me about my courage and honesty for the next twenty minutes. She’s totally into me under false pretenses. I felt like a complete dick for not telling her it was a joke, and at this point I couldn’t. I got her number in a strange way. I told her she was cool, too bad we were in a bar, and that we should meet up in a quieter place with us both sober. She was going to give me her number, but then said she had a boyfriend. I was under the impression that he was right behind me, so I tried to be discreet about it. I told her we’re just going to hang out, I need new friends anyway since I’m new in town. She said I don’t want her number. I assured her I did. Finally she folded and gave me her number. We parted ways, she said the next time we meet I’d better have apologized to the real horse girl. She was also self-conscious about her weight. I said she looked like the weird horse girl and she asked if it was because she was fat. I assured her no, but she brought it up again once or twice. My mistake in this interaction was that I did not control the frame at all, I let her completely take over with horse girl. Oh well, my first warm up, right?

I lost confidence in horse girl in a completely new way: I couldn’t trust it to not fool girls into believing my story anymore. I didn’t want to hurt any girls’ genuine feelings. That combined with my creative avoidance was an unstoppable team.

I saw a girl upstairs standing by herself, looking at the phone. Horse girl. Once I finished, she had to go.

Wow, did I really only talk to two girls tonight?

Well, the first approach went very well, in a way. She had her hands all over me, like I was the next Jesus Christ. I got her number, that was good. My state was very strange tonight, I haven’t felt this much anxiety in a while.