Anything needed or desired can be broadly categorized by four factors: looks, immediate satisfaction, long term satisfaction, and variety. This can be used to describe food (looks, tastes, nutrition, and variety), cars (looks, the feeling when driven, the gas mileage and sturdiness, and variety), and women (looks, sex, compatibility, variety).
These categories are usually prioritized differently depending on the person and their agenda. Most parents will tell their children to only prioritize long term satisfaction. Most friends care about all four do different degrees.
When it comes to women, though, most people are very adamant that everybody agree to their specific prioritization.
Parents want their children to have a compatible spouse, first and foremost. Secondarily, looks, since they will have to be seen together eventually. The other two are forgotten: they don’t care if the girl is good in bed, and they definitely don’t want the child to have a variety of women. The last point is a selfish one, oftentimes: they want their child to settle down and have grandchildren.
Men naturally want all four attributes in women, even if society has suppressed these urges to the point of disbelief. Instead, society promotes the idea of a soul mate, a specially crafted woman from God, just for you. Usually the first woman you have a long term relationship with is expected to be your soul mate; despite any flaws she may have, a man is expected to overlook it, because even though your supposed soul mate isn’t perfect, she’s perfect for you. (Keep trying to convince yourself that “she’s perfect for you” and not “she’s all you’ve got”.)
Agendas
Parents have agendas, to have grandchildren and to make sure their children are stable, because stability is comforting.
Women have agendas, because they want the man all to themselves.
Why does society view highly men who have a lot of women, but shun those who try to get more women? Passivity? It’s not their fault, they just attract a lot of women.
It’s strange that men are encouraged to go for a woman who they are compatible with (long term satisfaction), but of course the first thing people judge is the girl’s looks. Sexiness, or sluttiness, (immediate satisfaction) is often the first thing men judge a woman by. Variety is sought once a man has a woman, of course.
You may search for your soul mate for a limited time; depending on your geography, you have anywhere from 18 to 30 years. After that, you need to settle for something, anything. Don’t forget, once you are with a girl for a few years, she is your default soul mate, even if she no longer attracts you, has sex with you, or treats you with any dignity. Sometimes men
Most men do not get enough food. They are simply starving. And so, the first piece of food they get, they hold on to for dear life. Even if it doesn’t look good, doesn’t taste good, and may be poisonous, they hold on to it, because it’s better than nothing. And after a few years, they feel that they’ve been together for so long, they should just try to keep making it work, no matter how much their body and mind resent it.
For men such as myself seeking new food, it is an interesting journey. It is natural for me to want a variety of great looking, great tasting, and super nutritious food, but I am shunned by most.
Most people view this quest for new food to be a reckless one. “You can’t just sleep with one girl after another! You’ll just wind up old and lonely! You’ll break lots of girls’ hearts!”
Some people view food purely for their nutritional value, usually parents advising their children, and tell them to go for a girl who loves you, will do anything for you, cooks, cleans, is polite, et cetera. Looks are not that important, and neither is the taste. Of course, the parents are (hopefully!) not the ones who have to look and eat the food, so they don’t care about such things. They only care that the food is making you healthier.
If you do not have any, you will be starving, and you need some, any that you can get. And usually, most men can find some food, and they will latch on to it for dear life, worried that they won’t be able to get another piece of food.
I’d like to reach the point where I can choose my own food, for my own reasons.
Most people, especially parents choosing for their sons, try to choose food based on bland reasons, such as nutrition, is it healthy, does it make you feel good after eating it. This is equivalent to a woman who loves you for who you are, does the chores, isn’t a gold digger, et cetera. But that doesn’t take into account how the food looks nor how it tastes.
Some people are pigs. They just try to eat as much food as possible, which there is nothing wrong with, in my opinion. To each their own. Most people say that that’s bad, because it leaves a trail of destruction (hurt women), plus it leads to gluttony.
I’ve been meaning to meet up with Japanese girl. I set up a date tonight to go to an arcade, where she still had points on her card. Unfortunately when we got there, it was packed. We couldn’t play anything. I decided to just leave.
I suddenly had a craving for frozen yogurt. We went there, I got my frozen yogurt fix. We chatted a bit.
We went to a bar I’ve never been to before. I sat 90 degrees from her, alternating between facing the wall and her and facing the rest of the bar while having my back to her. I initially didn’t drink anything, since I had a bottle of water with me. Later on she bought a beer for me. I brought up that the Britney Spears song, “Womanizer”, reminds my ex of me. She asked if I was one, I said I had no idea how she feels that way. We talked about how we broke up. I asked if she were a womanizer, we debated about whether it’s supposed to be called a “manizer”. Eventually she admitted that she was one, but preferred the term “player”, but not when she’s in a relationship.
Conversation got pretty dry. I decided to move things along. She got the check. I mentioned I wanted to watch a certain movie. I told her we should watch it at her place. We took a cab to her place, rented the movie, watched it.
Kino escalation. We joked about her putting on her Halloween costume while watching the movie, which she did. I had my hand on her bare thighs at certain points, but I was still scared of going for the kiss.
Eventually the movie finished. She said earlier that she had something to do in the morning, and mentioned several times the time, but didn’t exactly kick me out. I should have gone further and went for the kiss. It’s weird, I guess it’s because I actually care about losing this one.
Anyway, I made her stay way past her bedtime. She seemed to enjoy my company, and not just as a friend. Progress made on our relationship, progress made on myself.
We all had some anxiety in the bar. I decided to drink with the guys. I’ve been relaxing my rules quite a bit recently. Martyr called me the laziest PUA he’s ever met. I dubbed myself the world’s second laziest PUA, paying tribute to Sinn.
I had enough of this anxiety crap, so I told the guys I was going to pee, then approach. I talked to a birthday girl for a few minutes, stacking even though I knew she wasn’t feeling me. Eventually I was locked out by them taking lots of pictures and me acting as a bystander. I left.
Shiz was smoking, which tempted me. I bummed a cigarette off him and we smoked outside. As soon as we were done, he said, we’re going to approach the first girls we see. I cheated. As soon as we got back in the bar, I approached the hottest girl I saw, a redhead with two Asian friends. I stacked until it was quite clear they wanted to get out of there. I let them go.
I found Shiz. He pointed out a blonde sitting by herself on a bench, saying he couldn’t go. I gave him five seconds to approach. He almost approached, so I went and talked to her. I stacked, but there wasn’t much compliance. I bounced her to the bar, we got our drinks. I tried to bounce her elsewhere, but she declined, saying she wanted to spend time with the birthday girl I opened previously.
Tonight I was supposed to meet up with a girl I met at the mall on 2008-11-02. I felt it was really flakey, so I had texted and subsequently called goth girl #2 earlier in the week, and set up a date for tonight as well. I wanted to see goth girl #2 more anyway.
Well, they both flaked. I decided to try a third date attempt, one who was much more reliable. As I was about to call her, she IMs me and asks me out for dinner. I accepted.
She initially wanted to go out for dinner, but I am poor these days, so I asked her to go to the supermarket with me to get food. We could then cook at my place. She reluctantly agreed.
She was late. I called her and it turned out she was still sleeping. Half an hour later we meet up. She again requests that we go out, and even offers to pay for me. For the first time, I drop my rule of not letting girls pay, and accept. We get okay food and I even have enough left over for another meal.
I brought her back to my place. She paid for my dinner, so I guess I have to put out! We watched a movie, I escalated. After the movie was done and the special features were exhausted, I went for the kiss. For some reason I am still uncomfortable with going for a kiss, even if my groping has gotten pretty far. Once I get a kiss in, I escalated a lot better.
She claimed she was sick and didn’t want to give me anything. I kept going anyway. She eventually told me to stop seducing her. I obliged for a few seconds.
Eventually she left. I walked her to the train station, but when I went for a kiss, she went for a kiss on the cheek. Oh well.
Today I did yoga with my mom and ex, haha. In the middle of it, I lightly kicked a girl in the head. After class, I went up to her and apologized. We exchanged pleasantries, I said I’ll see her next week.
Today I did about ten mall approaches, all horse girl. None really stuck, except for one. I didn’t think she was feeling me too much, but she didn’t leave either. When I ran out of steam, I figured she didn’t like me but I should go for a date anyway. Surprisingly, she agreed.
After getting her contact info, I ejected. I then kicked myself, coming to the conclusion that she was actually into me, but was very quiet and shy.
A classmate from improv asked me to voiceover for a video game. This should be interesting! I’ll definitely get a copy of the game when it comes out, if I get in.
Too bad those guys from the model agency never called me back. Perhaps my voice will bring me riches and glory rather than my really, really, ridiculously good looks.
Despite doing cold approaches all the time, I try to spend time with friends I don’t see very often as well, especially if it’s a social gathering. I am always looking to broaden my possibilities; social circle game is an important game to play too; to limit myself to cold approaches would be to limit my experiences and the rewards of my hard work.
On Saturday I went to a social gathering with old and new friends. I was basically the social guy, talking to every group. I used the excuse of getting pictures from people to get their Facebook info. No need to do hard core gaming here; I wasn’t very interested in most of them, but if any of them responded, I’m willing to go for it.
One girl in particular took an active interest in me. I asked for her contact info, she gave me her number. I had to say, “I’ll need your e-mail to find you on Facebook,” before she gave me her e-mail. Weird.
I was supposed to meet up with her sometime, but I’m too busy and lazy these days to follow up. Maybe before I leave.
Afterwards I hung out with Martyr and Shiz. It was already really late, I didn’t open anything. I think they might have, though.
I arrived at our usual bar. There was a $30 cover, but we knew the bouncer, who scooted us right in. I arrived first. I had lost faith in horse girl, for some stupid reason. I was uncomfortable for about half an hour, when Shiz and Martyr arrived. We were all feeling AA. There were a lot of girls in skimpy outfits.
I tried to alleviate the stress and the pressure, saying that tonight we’re going to have fun. Maybe we won’t talk to any girls, but when we have fun we usually do. If we put too much pressure on ourselves we’re just going to be miserable the whole night. So we had a few drinks to loosen up.
I didn’t take notes on my approaches, unfortunately, but I did talk to pretty much every hot girl I came across. I also practiced some dance floor stuff I learned in the workshop, though there were no circles of girls to take over. I practiced flinging a girl around, spinning, dipping. My wings had never seen me dance before. Now I just have to get more rhythm, said Shiz, haha!
In my drunken state, I probably messed up a lot of sets. I still tried to stack my stories and stuff, but I was only able to hook one girl. Unfortunately I didn’t do much with her afterwards, I just got her number.
Well, we had a lot of fun, and that’s damn important. It is also a reminder of what I am capable of doing, given enough social freedom.